An Angel Is Born

March 23, 2014 a little saint was born. We were saddened that our precious girl did have anencephaly, but yet happy that she was ALIVE!!! After reading so many stories with same diagnosis, I prayed to have at least few minutes or hours. But my greater prayer was a MIRACLE.  The miracle at that moment was that she was alive and breathing her own.

I remember everything about that day. I remember arriving to ER at 6am in the morning because my water broke.  At 2:20am I started to feel some contractions them every 20-30 were getting stronger. that was the day God has chosen for Angela to meet her parents and big sister. I remember  going to the room I would deliver her. The day was filled with so much joy and excitement but at the same time the deepest pain and sorrow knowing that day means saying hello and goodbye to my little princess. I couldn’t bare the thought of that because that means we will be leaving without her.

Three priests were told that our baby was going to be born. They were celebrating and offering Mass for us.  But Fr. Luft was the lucky one, he is a wonderful retired priest with a big love towards our family. He was going to meet the first tiny little beautiful saint.  We prayed, the room was full of so much peace and joy, the Holy Spirtit was there among us. 
Receiving the Holy Eucharist

I will never forget the feeling I felt when they handed me my beautiful and perfect baby girl.  All the pain and worry suddenly disappeared and in that moment my life was forever changed. My heart knew a new meaning to fierce love it had never felt before. Looking into that beautiful face for the first time and hearing her beautiful voice is the most unforgettable moment of my life. My heart felt an overwhelming kind of love I had never felt before. I will never forget all the beautiful details about this day. 

Family gathered to celebrate her birth and baptism

My husband cut the umbilical cord and the nurse put a little cap on her before I held her. I cried and cried. This was the first time  that we truly wept. Rony and I cried together, she was the perfect child, the child who was created exactly the way our Creator designed and in His eyes and ours was perfect. She was "knitted in my womb" and was "fearfully and wonderfully made" (Psalm 139, 13-17)

I held her, kissed her and hugged her. I told her how much we loved her. We were so happy to finally meet her and sad that this was the only time we would spend with her before she goes to Heaven.  We loved her so much. She was skin to skin with me  first, then Rony and Elizabeth.  She was able to nursed for less than a minute, after that she was not able to latch on. I pumped my breast milk, gave her the colostrum with a syringe, I was there trying to feed her .1ml every 20-40 minutes.  

Looking into that beautiful face for the first time and hearing her beautiful voice is the most unforgettable moment of my life

Here she was our amazing girl!! We wiped her and put her white dress, we prepared for a especial moment, her Bautism.  We felt very happy that our daugther was bautized to our Roman Catholic Faith 20 minutes after birth.

We took lots of pictures and videos because it was important for us to keep as many souvenirs as possible. A professional photographer from NILMDTS captured many beautiful moments that we will cherished forever. This is a great non-profit organization that provides the gift of remembrance photopgraphy for parents suffering the loss of a baby.  We took footprints and hand prints

We were given a large room at the end of the hall and Inever hear any other babies crying. Many of our supportive family, friends and church members were there as well giving her all their love. Every person deserves to be loved this way, every child  deserves a lifetimeEvery human has the rigth to a full life. Despite age, physical ability, or vulnerability, everyone should be given the opportunity to live and make their mark in the world. We sang to her, kissed her, held herand we were prapared to send her to her Eternal home with Jesus with dignity, respect and with so much love. Defend and take care of her from the moment of conception to her natural death.  Even strangers who follows Angelas's facebook page wanted to meet her. We received hundreds of messages of support, love, peace, comfort and hope. We started to feel the overwhelming love, peace and joy despite the suffering and pain. God gave us the child that we wanted, and we were going to love her despite her condition.

Everything in the entire world stopped at that moment. Icould not take my eyes off of her! She was the most beautiful girl Ihad ever seen in my entire life. God blessed us through Angela by giving us clearer vision to the importance of life, life is so precious that life is precious and we must live it to the  fullest, that life is the most beautiful gift God has given us and so we have to be thankful. Giving thanks in every moment at all times. We were grateful that God gave her to us.

Angela was not born as doctors had told me, she was not open from the eyebrow to the back. Her head was open only in the back with a encephalocele which is a sac-like protrusions of the brain and the membrane that cover it through openings in the skull .For doctors there was nothing else to do for her, just keep her comfortable but sophisticated treatments were not needed because she would not live. 

Angela taught both Rony and I how to "walk by faith and not by sight". ( 2 Corinthians 5, 7). We have learned to trust God even when we dont understand His plan. That God always has a better plan for our family and our lives and the lives of our daugthers.  Learning to trust that He is in the control all the times in every situation, even when our human hearts are pierced and broken.  If we look with eyes of faith, we know that our suffering is fashioned to draw us closer to God and secure for us eternal life with Him. This trust has the power to banish all fear, and all feelings of self-pity, and turn our weeping into rejoicing. We live every single day by faith, faith in out Lord we would get one more day. God gave us the grace to face everything , and if He is with us there is nothing to worry.

I thank God for allowing us and trusting us to be the parents of Angela. Our lives are irrevocably changed because of  our beautiful child. And for that, we are very proud. Her life brought such light into our lives as we could have never imagined. We just celebrated her 10 months birthday!!! God is always good. Praise be the Lord forever and ever. She is  a beautiful MIRACLE from the Lord. All Glory is to God!!!

It is a hard journey but our babies are more than worth the effort. We don't look back in regret and continue to look up in faith. By sharing our story, God will be glorified for all He has done for us. No matter what they tell you, always choose to do good. CHOOSE LIFE no matter how little time the baby can live. Worth living and knowing true love. We will not be manipulated by the culture of death, the God we serve is a living God and love.


Follow her in FB Our Baby Angela and Our Journey With Anencephaly

Angela's GoFundMe Page


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